A completely true scary story for my two remaining readers

Three months ago, I had thousands of readers every day and this blog had the opportunity to become somewhat successful. So, I did what any intelligent blogger would do and updated every day completely abandoned it for months. I expect that my remaining audience of two people (probably my sister and my mother-in-law) wonder where I went.

Well, folks, in case you have forgotten – I teach marching band. My family and friends refer to these four months of the year endearingly in such terms as the “marching band shell” and the like. In one week, I will emerge from the shell and will join my colleagues in gleeful shouts of “TGIF!” because I’ll get to work 8 hour shifts rather than up to 18 hours on Fridays.

My poor blog fell by the wayside due to exhaustion and lack of inspiration. That was, until last night when something happened that was worth breaking my writer’s block.

Husband and I decided to go out to eat and took the back roads on the way home. It was completely dark by this time and we turned right onto a country road. This road is so country, even the Beverly Hillbillies would call its inhabitants rednecks. Honey Boo-Boo is too good to live on this road.

A minivan coming from the opposite direction turned to follow us onto this road. As they turned, the driver began to turn the headlights on and off, flicked the brights on and off, and toyed with various combinations of headlights and emergency flashers.

“What the hell is wrong with this person?” Husband asked me.

“I don’t know, but they’re really freaking me out,” I replied.

Finally, the van’s driver turned off their headlights and left their flashers on, then sped up until they were almost touching our back bumper.

“I’m losing this guy,” Husband decided, and hit the accelerator. We flew down the road, far from the creepy van.

The van’s driver accelerated too, and soon they were right behind us again. At this point, I reached into my purse and found my cell phone in case I had to call 911. My imagination began to create scenes from horror movies and worst case scenarios. I started to wish we had a gun in the car.

About 5 minutes later, the van suddenly slowed down and stopped following us. We watched in the mirror as the van turned onto another road, once again putting on a light show with combinations of headlights, brights, and flashers. Both of us breathed a sigh of relief, and luckily that was the last we saw of the van.

Honestly, that’s the most exciting thing to happen to me lately, so it’s probably good that I haven’t written in a while, anyway. You hear enough mundane stories on Facebook as it is.

Well, I do have one other thing to talk about. I downloaded the new Muse album titled “The 2nd Law” a couple weeks ago. All of the music snobs of the world are in an uproar about it, calling it rubbish. I’ll admit there are a few songs on it that don’t give me the warm fuzzies or anything, but overall, I think it’s a great album and I don’t regret the $14 I spent on it.

Maybe it’s the musical training I have that causes me to analyze a song in much more detail than the average listener. When I listen to a song, my brain tears apart every track, analyzes the harmonic progressions, and picks out every little instrument and voice in the background. Matthew Bellamy is doing things with music that frankly, I don’t hear happening anymore in music. Who else these days is using an 80-piece orchestra or a choir in rock songs? Muse has a brilliant talent in knowing how to build a song from a whisper to a dramatic explosion in the matter of 2 minutes.

Most of the criticism is coming from long-time fans who call the album sold out pop, just because the band is experimenting with electronic sounds and songs that are inspired by dubstep. If you watch the making of the album videos that come with the deluxe version on iTunes, you can see that every sound is still created organically by the band’s instruments. There is nothing fake about this music. I guarantee you don’t hear any songs in this style on Top 40 radio that don’t use synthesizers and computers to create these same sounds. In my opinion, this is true talent.

Watch Muse on youtube to see them performing these new songs live. They sound just like the album versions. Matthew Bellamy sings in tune. Chris Wolstenholme sings background vocals in perfect harmony. Dom Howard is a percussion beast. The most impressive part for me is how well Matthew plays difficult lead guitar solos while singing in the top register of his voice with an unrelated melodic line.

Another criticism for the album revolves around the fact that there isn’t exactly a theme within the genre of the songs. They jump around quite a bit in terms of their sound. You know what? I think that’s one of the best characteristics of Muse. In my opinion, a band is truly talented when they can be so versatile in their sound. I like when a band’s songs don’t all sound the same.

Watch the following video and tell me these guys aren’t talented.

 

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About Facetious Firecracker

I observe the world and say what everyone is thinking, but is too afraid to say.

Posted on October 21, 2012, in Random Stories and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 17 Comments.

  1. That is a completely cray-cray Texas-Chainsaw-massacre-like creepy-as-shite driving story. And count me as reader #3.

  2. I must be #4, then as I am not your sister or your mother-in-law. That would have scared the living be-jeee-bees out of me. Now I don’t want to drive after dark. And is it marching band “shell” or marching band “hell”? Sounds brutal, but you should be more than halfway through, right?

  3. Welcome back! 😉 That is definitely horror movie scary, geez! What a psycho driver. Glad it was just a scare though and nothing more. 😉

  4. Oh, my gosh. My daughter lost all of her friends to marching band. She gets custody on occasional weekends, but most of the time she has to go to an actual game if she wants a glimpse of them. I can only imagine what it is like being an instructor! Welcome back!

  5. The Mother-in-Law

    As reader #2, the mother-in-law, that’s sure not what one wants to read about her kids. Just to be on the safe side, maybe you shouldn’t go out after dark any more. How’s that for motherly advice?

  6. I’m too lazy to count but I think I fall somewhere in your top 10 readers at this point. Glad you’re back! 😉

    I’m saying this only because nothing bad happened to you and I could be way off the mark but I’ve heard of gang members doing similar things and the first person/car to pay attention to them got hurt. Some sort of odd initiation process for them I believe. I don’t know if gang members hang out in your neck of the woods but I’m definitely glad you’re okay!

  7. I love Muse. I’m pretty sure that they are not of this planet. Also, I wonder what was up with the van? Not that I would have stuck around either to find out…

  8. I am new to the Muse craze. (I am so behind on these things) But from what I’ve heard from them so far, I am totally, like, digging it, man.

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